Finding True Confidence and Courage w/ Tommy Breedlove 393

In today’s episode, Jim and Tyson chat with best-selling author Tommy Breedlove! They dive into why your success, money, or stuff doesn’t ultimately fulfill you. If you’re finding yourself in a place where you need to make yourself a priority and find your self-respect and self-love, check out this week’s episode.

Meet Tommy Breedlove, the Wall Street Journal and USA Today Best Selling Author of the Book, “Legendary” and the founder of the Legendary Life Movement.… A movement that empowers driven people to be Pros in Leadership, Business, Mindset, & their Relationships. Tommy challenges high achievers to stop chasing the Ghost of “More” & “When” and lean-in to the Legendary leaders, spouses, and humans they were born to be.

As a Premiere Leadership, business, relationship, and mindset coach who is a regular featured keynote speaker at global events, Tommy started his 20-year corporate career at one of the largest financial consulting firms in the world, and eventually became a shareholder, the International Practice Leader, and a member of the board of directors for one of the largest public accounting and financial firms in the southeast U.S.

At the top of his career, Tommy experienced a transformational moment inspiring him to walk away from the corporate world to change his life and follow his true calling.

Tommy now serves clients and audiences everywhere by empowering them to build and live Legendary Lives. He guides people to discover a life of significance without compromising their drive or ambition. The simple tools he shares show them how to work in their zone of brilliance, obtain financial confidence, and live with meaning and balance. The goal is to help everybody to become the person they’ve always wanted to be.

When Tommy isn’t speaking or serving his clients, he enjoys traveling the world, hiking, and spending quality time with his wife and two dogs.

4:47 lead others better

7:26 my mind game and heart game

11:57 dangling that carrot

14:02 cut cable

17:45 more and when

21:05 keep up with the Joneses

24:02 shoulder to shoulder with you

Jim’s Hack: For some interesting approaches, check out the book Scaling Up Compensation 5 Design Principles for Turning Your Largest Expense into a Strategic Advantage by Sebastian Ross and Verne Harnish. A good book and a great read.

Tommy’s Tip: Do you want to live your life for that story you tell in your brain? We’re all telling ourselves a story, and most of it is not true. You can rewire your heart and mind and tell yourself a different story. To learn more, check out my book Legendary.

Tyson’s Tip: If you enjoy travel perks and discounts, check out the American Express platinum card.

Watch the podcast here.

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MaxLawCon 2022 Tickets are Live: https://maximumlawyer.com/maxlawcon/

Jim:                  Welcome back to The Maximum Lawyer Podcast. I'm Jim Hacking.

Tyson:             And I'm Tyson Mutrux. What's up, Jimmy?

Jim:                  Well, you just got off a plane flying around Central Missouri, didn't you?

Tyson:             I did. It was a lot of fun. I was awful on the radio today, like absolutely awful. I could not spit the words out of my mouth. I said-- instead of saying ramp, I said lamp. It was-- it's just-- it was just a rough-- but flying was great. I had great landings this morning but-- I did some night flying which is awesome, got to fly through some clouds. It was a lot of fun. But radio was not my forte this morning. So, I'm a little worried about this podcast because I just could not get it right. So, hopefully, I've worked out all the kinks this morning.

Tommy:          Oh, we’ve got you, brother. We’ve got you.

Tyson:             Yeah. Thanks. You have to carry me. You have to carry me.

Jim:                  Ground control probably thought you were drunk.

Tyson:             Oh, man. At the end, I said-- I was like, “Rough morning. Have a great day.” And he got a chuckle. So, it was-- It was a rough morning. We all have those days. It's fine.

Jim:                  All right.

Well, let me go ahead and introduce our guest. His name, as he mentioned at the top of the show. is Tommy Breedlove. He is a best‑selling author, both in the Wall Street Journal and USA Today. His book is called “Legendary”. And he's the founder of The Legendary Life Movement which is a movement that empowers driven people to be total pro’s in leadership business mindset and their relationships.

Tommy, welcome to the show.

Tommy:          Thank you, gentlemen. Excited to be here. Excited to have talked to a bunch of lawyers. Lawyers have been good for me over the years between their stress, overwhelmness, the pressures they face. Between doctors and lawyers, man, I'm very grateful for all of you. I'm happy to be here [laughs].

Tyson:             I bet.

So, Tommy, tell us about your journey and how you got to where you are today, sitting in this chair talking to us.

Tommy:          Totally, man. I'll do it real quick, since it's a quick show, is I spent 20‑plus years in financial services, public accounting, mergers and acquisitions, very similar - billing by the hour, very similar to the legal business. Grew up at Deloitte. Was recruited out of there to some big market firms - big German firms, ran an international practice.

But at 36 years old, there I was, junior partner, had all the shiny bells and whistles - suit, cuff links, watch. You name it, man. Corner office, looking down on downtown Atlanta.

I thought I had it all. I couldn't figure out why I was so-- outside, I looked, you know, tough guy, funny guy, important guy, arrogant guy. I looked like I had it all - the life of the party guy at the bar. But inside I was still scared, alone, worried, fearful and I couldn't figure out why, man. And when the money, the power, and the respect, and all the shiny things didn't fill me up, man, I turned to the dark side and basically The Wolf of Wall Street lifestyle for a couple of years.

And, at 36 years old, found myself in a ditch, literally looking up at the blue sky in downtown Atlanta, probably doing some multimillion‑dollar M&A deal the week before and like, “How did I get here? And why am I this way?” So, at that point, I started to turn my life around. And I'm invested in my mental game, my emotional game, my relationship game, my spiritual game, and my physical game. So, I made me my full‑time job, not billing 70, 80, 90 hours per week, my full‑time job. And the most amazing things happened to me over those three years.

Tangibly, here's what happened in three years. I went from junior partner, senior partner, international practice leader, elected to the board of directors, and an owner of one of the most prestigious firms in the southeast. My money doubled. My network 10X-ed. And my marriage went from life support to almost, you know, like strong, strong [laughs]. Still strong. Here we are, still together, 12 years later, I'm 48 years old. That was the tangible results.

The intangible results were true confidence, true courage, peace of mind, respect myself, lead myself, loved myself.

And that's when the coolest thing happened. That's when a bunch of lawyers, bankers, venture capitalist, entrepreneurs, corporate executives started reaching out to me from my network saying, “Hey, man. How'd you do it? You didn't give up your ambition and drive, but I've seen you work a whole lot less hours. I've seen you make a whole lot more money, earn a lot more respect. How did you do this? And give me that magic formula.”

And after about the 20th or 30th person asking, I was like, “This is something for me.” And I was already burned out. So, I sold my equity in the firm, resigned my board seat. And my wife was not too happy about that. And I went to chase this dream of building and living on the Legendary Life Movement for executive men and women in the legal space, the doctor space, the entrepreneur space, the corporate executive space to help us all not give up our relationships, to have self‑confidence, to have self‑respect, to lead ourselves so that we can lead others better.

And what I didn't-- I'll tell you-- Let me tell you why I had all those issues is I never dealt with the stuff from my childhood. And so, I grew up in and around-- this is the last thing I'll say, in and around a lot of-- and we all got-- we all got that stuff that we don't like to talk about. We like to put on the armor and never talk about it. But I grew up in the south side of Atlanta, a lot of violence and abuse. And at 18 years old-- I was going to be the first person in my family to ever go to college. And at 18 years old, had all these rights to all these universities, first person ever. And I became that violence and abuse - committed a violent crime. Was looking at seven years in prison on two felonies. Luckily, it was a first offense and dropped to misdemeanors.

And, literally, I spent my 19th birthday incarcerated. I picked myself up, dust myself off, went to work in a nuclear waste container factory during the day, community college at night, then up to University of Georgia. And I literally went from a-- I have to quit saying literally. I don't know why I'm doing that this morning [laughs]. But I went from a jail cell to Deloitte & Touche in three years. But I never dealt with all that stuff, right? And so, I just thought, if I outworked ‘em, outpowered ‘em, outhustled ‘em, outmaneuvered ‘em - and I did, and it got me all the way to the top, but it didn't fulfill me when I got there.

I'm a money‑is‑important guy. Let me say that first. I am a money‑is‑important guy but not at the cost of everything else - relationships, fun, health, etc. And so, that's what I'm all about, guys. Thanks for letting me share that.

Jim:                  Well, that's pretty powerful stuff. Talk to us about when you're sitting in jail and trying to figure out, “How did I blow this? What am I going to do?” What did your mind go through during those dark days?

Tommy:          Well, first of all, I was scared to death. You know, I'm an 18‑year‑old kid in South Atlanta Institution and it was not a friendly place.

Jim:                  Mm-hmm, yeah.

Tommy:          But something-- I don't know what kind of moment. People ask me how and why this happened. It's something bigger than me and I don't want to go down that path. But an African‑American gentleman who was 45 years old crossed racial lines and called me young blood. And he saw something in me.

I mean, I was a sheep walking into a den of lions, man. It was like the Roman Colosseum. And he's like, “Young blood, you're not going to become a part of this.” I guess he saw something in me. He saw something. But, you know, he probably saw fear. But he also said, Hey, this kid's got something. So, he mentored me. I didn't have good male and female role models growing up. I mean, I didn't have any. It’s actually the exact opposite of that.

And so, for him to cross racial boundaries, to hold me account and said, “You're not coming back here. I don't care what you’ve got to do. You’ve got to get rid of all those people in your life.” That's why I went to work in that factory during the day and community college at night. But through his help and guidance, it was fear, it was worry.

And when I got out-- even when I was working in that factory at $6 an hour doing brutal work, I knew I didn't want to go back to that neighborhood and live that life. And I knew I never wanted to go back to one of those institutions ever again. And so, that was motivation enough. But I never worked on my mind game and my heart game to build that self‑respect, self‑confidence, self‑love, and courage. And that didn't come till later on in life. But I just knew if I worked hard and kept my nose clean, until 36, I would be good.

Tyson:             So, Tommy, that life, I'm guessing, tries to drag you back in at times. And I'm sure it has over so many years. So, how do you prevent from falling back into that old life?

Tommy:          Yeah, it's interesting. I have this-- these aren't my words, is success, and money, power, and respect which is what most ambitious driven people want - success, power, money, and respect. If you live with self‑confidence, self‑respect, self‑courage, self‑love - lead yourself first, that you can lead others, all of that will magnify that 10X. But if you are eat up in worry, judgment, fear, you know, you have all these deep dark desires or these insecurities, you know, and we cover those up with so many masks and armors, it will magnify that. And that's what happened to me is I just thought the money, the power, the success would light me up. And, yes.

So, the whole point of that is darkness surrounds itself with darkness. Pain surrounds itself with pain. It doesn't matter if you're a lawyer, a venture capitalist, a successful entrepreneur, or a corporate executive. If you’re eat up in fear, anger, judgment, gossip, rage, worry, you're going to surround yourself with those people and you're going to surround yourself with that. But if you're eat up, again, with love, confidence, courage, peace, presence, you know, the real stuff, the real stone. I'm not talking about arrogance. Arrogance is loud and insecure. I'm talking about true confidence - owning your true power. You know, being who you are and not really giving two flying flips what that other person thinks of you because you're standing in your integrity and your power.

I've seen a shift in me. I wish I could touch lawyers, and entrepreneurs, and doctors. And it's like, if you do these things, I promise you, you will get on the right side of this equation. But a lot of us have to sink before we swim. And so, not all of us, thank goodness. Not all of us.

But all of that stuff that we crave is just a magnifying glass for who we are inside. And so, I don't just focus on the power of success. We're a power success money organization, but we start with mental toughness, emotional toughness, not religion toughness, but also spiritual toughness, if that's important to people.

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Jim:                  You're listening to the Maximum Lawyer Podcast. We're talking to Tommy Breedlove today. He's the author of the book “Legendary”.

So, you claw yourself all the way back. You're at the top of your game at Deloitte. You're very, very successful. And then, you have this crazy idea to walk away from it and go out on your own. Talk to me about the last day before you went out on your own and then the first day when you were on your own.

Tommy:          Actually, that's a great question. I love this question.

So, I actually had moved on from Deloitte to a big German firm and then a big mid‑market firm here in the Southeast. So, I was I was a partner, shareholder, a board member, and significant owner of this firm.

So, I just had a great-- You know, I'm in the coaching business. I have a coach. I run masterminds. I'm in a mastermind. So, you know, I believe you have to practice what you preach. So, I've had this unbelievable coaching session with-- I'll call her Saint Nancy, her name's Nancy [inaudible 00:11:17]. And I'm in my jeep driving to the firm, got my suit on, I call my wife. And it's Valentine's Day. I had forgotten it was Valentine's Day. I was like, “I'm going to walk away today. I'm going to sell my equity.” And she's like, “Wait. Whoa! What? What?” I was like, “No. I'm walking away today.”

And I walk into the firm. You know, I was on the board and a senior partner but, you know, I was 39. And most of the people on that board were in their 60’s. And so, I walk in and one of my mentors and fellow senior partners and board members-- he cleared his calendar for the day and tried to talk me out of it for that whole day. Over the weekend, I got all these emails telling me I was an idiot. “You're 39. You're going to be the highest earning partner in the history of this firm. You're one of the youngest people ever in this firm.”

So, they were jangling that carrot, but I knew, deep down inside, I was going to become the cancer. I didn't love it anymore. They didn't have a check that would light me up. And I knew, if I didn't get in the arena, I would live with all these regrets. Yes, I'd make a boatload of money, but I knew I'd be doing it at my integrity and at my soul level. So, I walked away.

Now, it took me about four or five months because I had to sell equity, transfer clients, did network, blah, blah, blah. It took me a long time. So, it wasn't like I walked and had a Jerry Maguire moment, took my goldfish, because there was legal matters to it.

So, first day, you know, you have this. I don't know if I can say it. I'll say, Oh, hell moment. I'll say that because I think when you say that-- I'll say a oh, hell moment and had these visions of me living under a bridge. I mean, 65% of my household income went out the door like that. You know, my wife, luckily, is successful on our own right.

But what I loved about it is so many people in my network walked away because they thought I was crazy. But the people that stayed and what my network looks like now-- I stayed the course. I stood there with confidence and courage. And I just started building. And I just started building. And I just started building. And we failed and we keep building. And we fail and we keep building. And from money, to success, to happiness, to fulfillment and making true impact in this world. What we were doing back then, and what we're doing now, there's no comparison on any level but we get stuck in.

And I'm not telling you-- if you're a lawyer listening to this, I'm not telling you to go have a Jerry Maguire moment and walk away from your firm, or sell your practice, or, you know, go fire your partners and all that stuff. I'm just telling you, if you have these dreams and desires, if you look back, you will look back with regrets.

Some people I know really like that world. I've still got a lot of friends in the financial, legal, banking, M&A, VC world. But, for me, when I look back-- but, now, we're 10 years into this thing now. And so, looking back from fulfillment, to impact, to money, success, fun, and truly getting up every day and want to seize the day, it's night and day.

But if I would tell you I wasn't full of fear, like I'm going to live under a bridge, eating-- I cancelled my cable and sold my wife's car - not my car, my wife's car, her Audi. And she's like, “You know I have a job, right? I can pay for my own car. You’ve got to go sell your car.” I mean, there was crazy stuff that I did. Cut cable. Who does that? Anyway. So yeah, there were some moments of, “Hell, what did I just do?”

And the network thought I was crazy because you only know what you know. And we get sucked into that world. And we become married to what we do as opposed to married to who we are. And I think that's important to recognize. I knew. There was moments-- and, man, I was almost unfire - almost unfireable at the firm. Of course, you can get let go if you do something crazy.

But I remember walking off that elevator and feeling it in my chest and shoulders. And I knew, when I couldn't sell it or recruit for it anymore, I was like I'm doing them and me a favor. And they couldn't hear that. I even told them that. And they-- because I was a big revenue generator for ‘em. And I just had to walk away, man. I've never been happier in my whole life and I hope they're doing well, seriously.

Tyson:             So, Tommy, now, you serve clients and you empower them to build-- and I'm reading from your bio, build and live legendary lives which I think is a cool name. I like the coffee mug, legendary. What does that mean, living a legendary life? Like what does that mean? I mean, that can mean a lot of different things to a lot of different people.

Tommy:          It can mean a lot of different things. The reason I picked the word legendary-- great question. The reason I picked the word legendary is, if I came on the show and said, “Tommy Breedlove is legendary,” you guys would probably hang up the Zoom, laugh at me. Meaning, making a lot of jokes in your community, and you would be right.

The reason I picked the word legendary is that's a word that's given to us by our community, our families, our friends, our networks, our clients. And we can be horrible legends or good legends. And so, I like that it's given to us. We have to earn it. And we can earn it in the good ways and bad ways. And, trust me, I was on one side of karma for 36 years. I've been on the other side, now, for 12 years.

So, here's what living a legendary life means to me. A legendary life means living a life of purpose. And, by the way, if you look at the stars and ask why I'm here, or at a fire, and like, “Why am I here? And what does this all mean?” You don't have purpose. So, to me, it’s living a life of impact, purpose, and significance.

Here's an important one. It’s being the master and conqueror of your time, not living a life - a busy life. What kind of joke is that? You don't have any more-- you have 24 hours a day in all of us. Spend to master your time. It's building a world class network of friends and colleagues. It's mastering your mindset which is a lifelong pursuit. It's emotional strength of courage and confidence. It's having true intimate relationships with your significant other, your family, your friends. And it's about living the good life. It's about living life in your power, on your terms, in your consciousness, and your integrity without compromising your ambition, drive, financial freedom.

But, at the end of the day, for me, a legendary life-- like money's important. Again, it's a magnifying glass. I am in the money business. I am in the leadership, power, success business. But, again, it's a magnifying glass. It will give you experiences. It will not buy you happiness.

And for me, it's about owning your own power. And when you walk away from this earth and, it is preciously short - life is preciously short, that God willing, you've left these people, community, your organization better than you found it. And that, when you're not there, somebody said, “You know what, it has nothing to do with money or power.” That dude, that gal lived a legendary life.

Jim:                  You mentioned that you have worked with lawyers and non‑lawyers. I'm wondering--

Tommy:          A lot of lawyers [laughs]. Thank you. You've made me quite successful [laughs].

Jim:                  --what lessons or traits have you noticed with the lawyers that you worked with? I mean, a lot of the people that we talk to seem to be sort of stuck. They don't maybe rely on-- they don't trust themselves is one thing that I noticed a lot. And a lot of them are sort of slow to change. But I'd love to hear your experience working with different kinds of lawyers.

Tommy:          I think, depending on whether they own their own firm or they’re in a large firm, I had both. I think it's the pressure of the ghost of more and when. You know, when I get here, whether you're in a big organization or on your own, or when I have more of this, I will do these things, whether it's spend more time with my family.

And, by the way, the model is broken. The whole realization/utilization. I don't-- I'm not going to get technical. But, if you're listening to this, I have a feeling you know what I'm talking about - the whole billable hour realization/utilization and using humans as machines is broke.

And so, I think, you know, we're always raising the bar on ourselves which makes us ambitious and innovative, right? I don't care if you're in a big organization, small, firm, mid firm, you own your own firm, you’re a partner, and whatever. I've seen it all. But I think we're always raising the bar for more money, more success, more impact, but the model’s broken.

But I think the pressures -the peer pressure, I think it's what we know. I think a lot of lawyers and doctors-- I'll put some doctors in here, too. They identify with what they do and not who they are. And they're going to prioritize that first. And I think that's a broken paradigm shift.

And we re‑wire people. We re‑wire corporate executives and entrepreneurs too because we say families first. Bullshit. We don't put our families first. We put our careers first. Let's stop lying, 100%. And it's okay to spend the majority of your time in your career. It's about quality over quantity.

But we put our careers first. Probably, our network second. Our friends and family, third. And then, ourselves, last. That's completely backwards. We’ve got to start with ourselves first - leading ourselves first, respecting ourselves first, building courage, confidence, boundaries, power in yourself. Then, concentrate on your friends, family, and network, second.

And if you do one and two right, if you lead yourself first, and then lead your family, friends and network second, your business-- and I've seen it, time and time again, will be more profitable, more sustained. You'll have better people. You'll have A players. And you won't feel the pressures because you're living life on your terms. And you can still make hundreds of millions of dollars. I've seen it. But you've got to put yourself first, family, friends and network second, business last. And that is almost impossible for a billable hour institution to do because they get their status, they get their identity. And what we do is work really, really, really hard on re‑wiring that. And then, when they start seeing the shift, and they start seeing what happens to them, and their families, and their lives, and their businesses, that's when we know we're winning. So, that's what I see. But it's not just lawyers. It's just us ambitious‑driven types, men and women. We all suffer from it.

Tyson:             Tommy, Jim and I see a lot of people that kind of get stuck in these ruts. They kind of get stuck in this lifestyle, kind of like what you were in, and they just can't get out of it. They’ve got the golden handcuffs. They've got to support their families. They’ve got to do all these things. And I was going to ask you about like what’s your advices on getting out of that rut. But then, there's this part in the questionnaire that you filled out for us, and it's about participating in your own rescue. Are those two related, in any way?

Tommy:          150%.

Tyson:             And, if not, explain to me.

Tommy:          So that was going to be my closing remark, when he asked me, “What is the tidbit you're going to give?” So, we'll do it twice. And I'll do it in two different ways. Here's the problem, too. It doesn't-- you know, think about if we made 100 bucks, we're looking at-- we're living a $120‑lifestyle. For making a million bucks, we're living a $1.2‑million lifestyle. Not all of us. But, hopefully, if you're making a million or living on $800,000.

But so many of us want to keep up with the Joneses. It's a status game. And it's a zero‑sum game. And so, you feel the financial pressures. You feel the private school pressures. You feel the pressures of living a certain lifestyle, looking a certain way, and, you know, hopefully, attracting those clients. So, it's a status game and it's a zero sum, and you can't win that game because there's always a bigger boat. There's always somebody with more. And you're comparing yourself with that.

But here's-- if you're in a rut, you can't drink yourself out of it. You can't have sex-- you can't do all the things that we turn to - drugs, alcohol, sex, binging on Netflix. What garbage? 24 hour-- whatever your thing is. And we all have our things. You can't-- that's not going to get you out of it.

And so, you’ve got to look in the mirror. If you're unhappy, your relationship’s on turmoil, you're not fulfilled, you feel like you're lost, you feel like your life's out of control, you're loaded with stress, worry, depression, anger, rage. And, by the way, that's being put into your eyes and ears 24 hours a day on news and in the social - it's poison. First of all, turn that crap off. That'll help you immediately.

Second, is go find the nearest mirror. And I mean this, with all dude love, that is your problem and your solution. That's your problem and your solution. So, what will you choose? Because the only power you have his choice.

And, by the way, lawyers, I love you. You think you're in control? Shit. You have no control except for your choices. Go find them nearest mirror, that is both the problem and the solution. And what will you choose to remove from your life today - Is it a negative person? Is it binging on Netflix? Is it too much news? Is it too much social?

Is it just-- I mean, what is it? Is it drinking two beers as opposed to 12? What are you going to do to remove something negative in your life and what positive thing are you going to add into your life to start building emotional toughness, mental toughness, self‑confidence, self‑respect, self‑love, so that you can stop chasing the ghost of more and when and whatever your neighbor has? That's the advice I'd give ‘em.

Jim:                  I think that's so important because so often we just think about add this, add this, add this, try this, do this. And we don't think about removing things. And I think that removing things that are-- even things that are positive. You know, you only have so many hours in the day, you only have so much energy, you only have so much focus. And so, I really think that we lose track of the strength of removing things.

Tommy:          Let me say this. You're 100% right.

The quick fix is to remove one negative - a person, a habit, a thing. And the long‑term muscle building - your emotional muscles, your mental muscles, your spirit muscles, your physical muscles, is going to the gym - the mental gym, the emotional gym, the spiritual gym. That takes long term but that will have the longest term benefits. But the removing something’s a quick fix.

And let me say this because it's important. I am no sage on the stage and guru. And, by the way, I suffer from 100% of everything I just talked about. 100% I work on it every day. With the ghost of more and when, the insecurities, the worries, the fears - they kick in.

And I was telling my wife the other day, because we've been working our butts off for two years and we kind of lost ourselves, I was like, “We’ve got to reconnect and we’ve got to reconnect now.”

And so, this is not what it sounds like to have figured out. I walk shoulder with shoulder with you. The stuff that I'm preaching, I practice. And, luckily, I get to talk in the mirror every single day and say, “Tommy, are you listening to yourself?”

But all of us struggle with something. The key is in the work - the daily routines. Take an hour for yourself every day, just an hour for you, that's in your heart, mind, soul and your body so that you can go lead yourself to lead others - and I'm talking to myself.

And on the-- my wife and I were talking. We just got back from vacation which was healing for us. We just needed some real time. And I told her, “You know, on this pursuit of freedom and simplification, we have a really complicated life.” I'm like, “You know, we're on this pursuit of simplification but we have all of these businesses and real estate. And we’ve got a hotel now and all these people and staff.” And I'm like, “Our life is really complicated and we're trying to live simply and free.” But we have made those choices, but we have doubled down ourselves and communicate.

So, I just want everybody to know, whatever you're dealing with - stress, overwhelm, fear, worry, relationship issues, the key is you're not alone. If you're dealing with it, a million people are dealing with it. I've dealt with all of it. I still deal with all of it, but I work on it every day to be the best me I can be. And more days than not, eight out of 10 days, I win.

So, I just wanted to say that, so I don't sound like some guru. I'm talking to myself as much as I'm talking to y'all. And y'all’s a very technical term we use down here in Georgia.

Tyson:             Very familiar. My wife is from Louisiana so I'm very familiar with y'all.

Tommy:          It's a whole different language there, brother [laughs]. That’s a different language.

Tyson:             [inaudible 00:25:30] Well, they're from northern Louisiana so it's not quite as-- not quite as bad.

But, we do need to wrap things up. We want to be respectful of your time.

Before we do, I want to remind everyone to join us in the big Facebook group. We've got over, I think, 5300 members now, I think, is where we're up to. Join us there. If you want a more high level conversation, join us in The Guild, maxlawguild.com. Remember to get your tickets to MaxLawCon2022. Go to maxlawcon2022.com.

Jimmy, what's your hack of the week?

Jim:                  So, our good friend, Brian Mittman, a friend of the show, a member of The Guild, recommended a book to me because he knows that we are talking in our firm about compensation and sort of compensation structures. And it's by Verne Harnish, who wrote your favorite, Scaling Up. And it's called Scaling Up Compensation. It's really good. It's a short read. It's only on the Kindle. But there's sort of five main approaches that he has in there. And one of them that I really liked was to make your pay structure unique. And, you know, we spend so much time trying to make unique marketing, unique practice processes and so forth. But the idea of developing a compensation that helps deliver the outcomes that you want. It's a really great book, good read, and I highly recommend it.

Tyson:             You could also get it on Apple, by the way. In case you want to. It does not appear that there is an audiobook but you can do the-- you can actually read, you know, fashioned way and actually read it. So, I'm curious, do you know-- because in the actual book, Scaling Up, he talks about how like not everybody's worth the same. Like some people are worth more than others, so don't be afraid to pay them more. Did he talk about that in the book?

Jim:                  Definitely. And not only just roles being-- you know, different roles provide different values but also within the same kind of a role that-- you're right, that some people are A‑plus and so people are C’s, so.

Tyson:             I like it. Because I do think that there's like this tendency to wonder. It’s like, “Oh, everyone at this level gets paid the same amount.” No. It's bullshit. They're not making the same amount of money, so.

Tommy:          Amen.

Tyson:             And I can drop the S word, so. Yeah. Since Tommy already dropped one, I can drop one, too.

Tommy:          Amen.

Tyson:             But, Tommy, you're up next. What-- I already kind of ruined it for you. I'm sorry about that, but what is your tip or hack of the week?

Tommy:          So, I would say-- just since we've all used participate in your own rescue, I would say-- I would ask everybody on this call, Do you want to live your life or that story you tell yourself in your brain? Because we're all telling ourselves a story. And most of it's not true. And it's been wired into us. But what I'm telling you is you can re‑wire your heart mind and tell yourself a different story and write the ending to your story. So, I'll say that.

The other hack I would give you, which is on Audible, is to read “Legendary” [laughs]. If you don't want to read it, I'll read it to you, if you don't mind my southern accent. So, I'll say read that book because I’ve got to do that, brother.

Tyson:             Very good.

And, actually, this is the point where I do need to ask you. I usually do it earlier. But how do people get in touch with you? How do they get the book? If they want to reach out to you, how do they reach out to you and all that?

Tommy:          Yeah, absolutely.

And we'll give this link to you guys. If you want to check out the book or you want to check out one of our retreats, we run executive and entrepreneur retreats, a lot of lawyers, a lot of doctors a lot of entrepreneurs. So, we have retreats coming up. We have a mastermind coming up, conferences, you name it. It's all about ambitious driven people getting together and having authentic conversations. We will give you this link. If you go to legendarylifemastermind.com/maximumlawyer, it's all there. We’ve got a lot of free goodies for you. We’ve put out a Legendary Minute. It takes less than 30 seconds a day to read. So, check out the book.  Or, you can email me directly, I have three or four people checking that, at [email protected]. Any of those things.

But if you want a taste of who we are, what we do, and why we do what we do - and I have a feeling that people on this call will relate to the story at the beginning and then the tools behind it, just check out the book. It's everywhere - bookstores, airports, audible electronic. Go check out the book. That's a good way to dip your toes.

But, again, we'll give you a link, legendarylifemastermind.com/maximumlawyer. We'll get that to you guys.

Tyson:             So, Jim, Tommy just one‑upped us-- he two‑upped us because we have one person each checking our email and he has three people checking his email which is--

Jim:                  Wow.

Tyson:             --that’s pretty impressive. That’s right. That’s pretty good.

Tommy:          Email is somebody else's to‑do List, man. You know, email is somebody else's to‑do list [laughs].

Tyson:             I 100% agree. That's why we have people checking our email.

But my tip is-- and I don't think we've given this tip before, hopefully not. But the American Express Platinum Card, if you don't have it, I recommend it. I'm not a huge proponent of recommending credit cards but the travel perks, when it comes to that, are really great.

I'm curious, Jim, if you have the platinum card because you travel so much.

Jim:                  I got it a month ago because I'm starting to travel a lot more and not just on Southwest.

Tyson:             Yeah. So, it's-- yeah, it's really nice. You get a lot of the travel perks when it comes to, you know, lounges, discounts, all that kind of stuff. So, I highly recommended. So, check that out for no other reason but for the travel perks.

Tommy:          I've had one for 25 years so I'm all in.

Tyson:             Yeah. It’s good stuff.

So, Tommy, thank you so much for coming on today. We really, really appreciate it. We appreciate your time. A lot of great information you shared so thank you so much.

Tommy:          Gentlemen, I'm so grateful for you guys. Have an epic day.

Tyson:             You, too. Thanks, Tommy. See you, bud.

Thanks for listening to The Maximum Lawyer Podcast.

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Have a great week and catch you next time.