Stop Doing This for Lasting Change

Are you someone who has a goal for the New Year but unsure if you will achieve it? In this episode of the Maximum Lawyer Podcast, CEO Becca Eberhart discusses the importance of keeping promises to oneself for personal growth and goal achievement. 

A new year means new goals and achievements. For many people, they are confident that they will achieve their New Year's resolution. For others, they make that promise and then let things fall behind. Becca shares how important it is to not break promises to yourself. In order to see change or growth, the key is to make commitments that are possible in order to get to your goal. 

For example, if you have a goal to lose 10 pounds in 3 months, make a commitment to go to the gym 1 hour a day or meal prep for work days. The follow through is the only thing that will keep that promise. If you struggle to keep promises to yourself, Becca shares a few ways to change this. One way is to change your mindset to respecting yourself the way you do others. Most times, people will not let a friend down so don't do it to yourself.

Following through with promises is more realistic if it is documented. It is so easy to just say in your head that you will lose 10 pounds or eat healthier. Write the promise down on a sticky note or in your notes app on your phone. This is a good way to hold yourself accountable and turn the promise from a thought into something tangible. Holding yourself accountable also shows in being realistic in your goals and what you can actually achieve. Don't set too big a goal if you truly know you can't deliver!

Take a listen to learn more!

Episode Highlights:

• 00:24 Becca discusses the significance of keeping promises to oneself
• 2:24 Becca offers advice on how to make changes
• 3:25 Becca explains the importance of writing down promises

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Transcripts: Stop Doing This for Lasting Change

Speaker 1 (00:00:01) - Run your law firm the right way. The right way. This is the maximum Lawyer podcast. Lawyer podcast. Your hosts, Jim hacking and Tyson new tricks. Let's partner up and maximize your firm. Welcome to the show.

Becca Eberhart (00:00:24) - Welcome to another episode of the Maximum Lawyer podcast and Happy New Year. I'm Becca Eberhardt, CEO at Maximum Lawyer, and this week we're kicking off 2024. In today's episode, we're talking about one way to make this year different from the rest. And let's be honest, there's a ton of things that you can do to make this year different or better, and it can be something different for everyone. But I do think this one thing could help anyone, and it's a great thing to reflect on and ask yourself, where do I stand on this one thing? And that is, do you break promises to yourself? I was once on a coaching call and they asked us, how confident are you that you'll meet this goal that you set for yourself? And they were a little surprised when I confidently said, oh, I'll meet it.

Becca Eberhart (00:01:10) - I don't break promises to myself, but it wasn't always this way. Truthfully, this confidence came from becoming sick and tired of self-sabotage. I've always tried my best to keep my word to everyone else, but when it came to myself, it wasn't nearly as important. That was until I was able to identify that I wasn't growing as quickly as I wanted, and I wasn't seeing the progress I wanted in my life, and that was because I was consistently breaking the promises I made to myself. So often we make promises to others and try our best to keep them. Yet when it comes to the commitments we make to ourselves, the follow through can be a bit more elusive. The truth is, we've all broken promises like this and it might feel like no big deal. After all, the only person you're letting down is you. Author Scott H. Young said it best. Breaking promises to yourself has the same cost as breaking it to other people, except the person you trust. Less is you. Breaking promises to yourself almost guarantees that you'll continue to do it because you subconsciously believe yourself less and less every time you say you're going to do something and then don't follow through.

Becca Eberhart (00:02:24) - You might be thinking, yes, keeping promises to myself sounds great, but how do I make the change when I'm giving my all to everyone else and I feel like I don't have the time or energy left? And that's what makes it easy for me to break the promises I make to myself. First, you have to flip your mindset. If you don't hold the belief that breaking promises to yourself is a bad thing, you won't stop. But if you can put your self-respect on the same level as everyone else in your life that you consistently do things for, you'll soon see changes in what you accomplish next. If you make a promise and nobody heard it. Did it really happen? The problem with making promises only in your mind is there's no trail, no accountability, and no consequences when you fail to follow through. The entire act of breaking promises to yourself can seem like not that big of a deal when this is the way you go about it. But this is why we need to change how we make our promises.

Becca Eberhart (00:03:25) - If you set out to do something, it needs to be written down somewhere. Maybe it's just a sticky note on your desk where you can see it every day. Or maybe you love a good to do list, so you put it in the notes app on your phone or in a task management software. I really like adding goals into task management software like asana, even if it's for my personal life. This way you can set it to recurring if it's a habit you're trying to incorporate, or at a due date. If it's something more like a project that you can complete by taking your promise from a mere thought to writing it down, you turn it into something tangible. Finally, in making this change stick is to commit to less. Wait, what? You said this was about making this year better? Well, in this case, less is more or better. You wouldn't schedule an appointment with your doctor when you couldn't go right? So don't over schedule or overcommit yourself to yourself. Be as realistic as you are with others when you tell yourself you're going to do something.

Becca Eberhart (00:04:27) - It's human nature to want to think about future possibilities and dream big. But there's a reason most people don't keep their New Year's resolutions by being someone who agrees to less but regularly follows through, you'll cultivate more self-respect, trust, and confidence. And when you say no to a new promise, you'll be saying yes to investing in the promises you've already made. That's it for this week. Cheers to 2024, a year where keeping our promises to ourselves becomes the foundation for the lives we want to live, and the businesses we want to grow.

Speaker 1 (00:05:04) - Thanks for listening to the Maximum Lawyer podcast to stay in contact with your hosts and to access more content. Go to Maximum lawyer.com. Have a great week and catch you next time.